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Mar. 13th, 2012 12:18 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
loobywibbleLate night Plurk discussions on the idea of Ichigo and Renji pitting their respective fanboys against each other turned into this:
“I’m fairly convinced there are actually rules against this sort of behavior you know. It’s barbaric.”
“What’s barbaric about a little friendly inter-division competition?” Ichigo huffed, tossing a chocolate croissant at Renji who snatched it up out of midair with a grunt of thanks. “’sides, Rikichi started it.”
“Fuck no he didn’t! Yours said my hair looked like a pineapple!” Renji spluttered around the large hunk of croissant he’d just bitten off.
Rukia sniffed delicately and brushed the croissant crumbs off her shoulder with as much dignity as she could muster.
“You are both acting like children. Those poor boys. Besides, that line of reasoning is utterly ridiculous, Ichigo doesn’t even have a division. ”
“C’mon Rukia, like you wouldn’t be getting in on it if yours was competing,” Renji retorted. “Lighten up, you used to be fun.”
“I am fun!”
The two redheads exchanged knowing looks which they immediately regretted as they were sharply kicked in the shins for their efforts.
“Fuck!”
“Bitch, why’d you do that?!”
“Abarai-fukutaichou,” Rukia said in her very best ‘Kuchiki Rukia is displeased and very noble and important so you best listen, you plebian’ voice, “that sort of language is not becoming of a high ranking officer of the Gotei 13.”
Ichigo snorted and took a sip of his tea while Renji looked thunderous.
“What are you pickin’ on me for? Why’s Ichigo getting off lightly?”
“Because Ichigo is an incurable idiot who only responds to kicks in the head, and it’s not polite to do that when the company is seated.”
“Hey!”
Renji looked victorious.
“In any case,” Rukia continued, shooting them both a disapproving glare that Byakuya in particular would have been proud of, “sending Rikichi and Ryunosuke off to do ridiculous tasks in the name of competition is positively barbaric.”
“You’re just saying that because we sent them to see who could get your brother’s hair noodles,” Ichigo said off-handedly while Renji went a very strange shade of purple. “Knock it off Rukia, we all know you’d have sent Shino off to do it too.”
“For your information,” she replied, ignoring the fact that Renji had turned into some sort of aubergine/pineapple hybrid, “I would have done no such thing, nor would I condone any such childish behavior on the part of my protégé.”
“Bullshit. Where is Shino anyway?”
For a few moments, it seemed as though Rukia wasn’t going to answer. She raised her teacup to her lips and sipped elegantly. Renji was gradually returning to a normal colour and Ichigo was about to give it up as a lost cause until:
“…I sent her to do my laundry.”
“Ha! Y’see! You’re just like us!” Renji crowed triumphantly.
“I am not, I’m merely making use of her services.”
“At least ours get to have a little fun out of the deal,” Ichigo commented.
It was at that moment that all three went very still, as a particularly murderous burst of familiar reiatsu filled the air.
“They found the hair noodles,” Renji pronounced grimly.
“To Urahara’s hidden training ground?” Ichigo suggested.
“Before Taichou scalps us ya mean?”
“Yup.”
They were already gone before they could articulate any further agreement. Rukia shook her head and picked up the remnants of Renji’s chocolate croissant. She would have to remember to thank Inoue for the bread when she would inevitably have to deliver the sad news of Ichigo's demise at the hands of her brother to the gang in Karakura.
“Idiots.”
“I’m fairly convinced there are actually rules against this sort of behavior you know. It’s barbaric.”
“What’s barbaric about a little friendly inter-division competition?” Ichigo huffed, tossing a chocolate croissant at Renji who snatched it up out of midair with a grunt of thanks. “’sides, Rikichi started it.”
“Fuck no he didn’t! Yours said my hair looked like a pineapple!” Renji spluttered around the large hunk of croissant he’d just bitten off.
Rukia sniffed delicately and brushed the croissant crumbs off her shoulder with as much dignity as she could muster.
“You are both acting like children. Those poor boys. Besides, that line of reasoning is utterly ridiculous, Ichigo doesn’t even have a division. ”
“C’mon Rukia, like you wouldn’t be getting in on it if yours was competing,” Renji retorted. “Lighten up, you used to be fun.”
“I am fun!”
The two redheads exchanged knowing looks which they immediately regretted as they were sharply kicked in the shins for their efforts.
“Fuck!”
“Bitch, why’d you do that?!”
“Abarai-fukutaichou,” Rukia said in her very best ‘Kuchiki Rukia is displeased and very noble and important so you best listen, you plebian’ voice, “that sort of language is not becoming of a high ranking officer of the Gotei 13.”
Ichigo snorted and took a sip of his tea while Renji looked thunderous.
“What are you pickin’ on me for? Why’s Ichigo getting off lightly?”
“Because Ichigo is an incurable idiot who only responds to kicks in the head, and it’s not polite to do that when the company is seated.”
“Hey!”
Renji looked victorious.
“In any case,” Rukia continued, shooting them both a disapproving glare that Byakuya in particular would have been proud of, “sending Rikichi and Ryunosuke off to do ridiculous tasks in the name of competition is positively barbaric.”
“You’re just saying that because we sent them to see who could get your brother’s hair noodles,” Ichigo said off-handedly while Renji went a very strange shade of purple. “Knock it off Rukia, we all know you’d have sent Shino off to do it too.”
“For your information,” she replied, ignoring the fact that Renji had turned into some sort of aubergine/pineapple hybrid, “I would have done no such thing, nor would I condone any such childish behavior on the part of my protégé.”
“Bullshit. Where is Shino anyway?”
For a few moments, it seemed as though Rukia wasn’t going to answer. She raised her teacup to her lips and sipped elegantly. Renji was gradually returning to a normal colour and Ichigo was about to give it up as a lost cause until:
“…I sent her to do my laundry.”
“Ha! Y’see! You’re just like us!” Renji crowed triumphantly.
“I am not, I’m merely making use of her services.”
“At least ours get to have a little fun out of the deal,” Ichigo commented.
It was at that moment that all three went very still, as a particularly murderous burst of familiar reiatsu filled the air.
“They found the hair noodles,” Renji pronounced grimly.
“To Urahara’s hidden training ground?” Ichigo suggested.
“Before Taichou scalps us ya mean?”
“Yup.”
They were already gone before they could articulate any further agreement. Rukia shook her head and picked up the remnants of Renji’s chocolate croissant. She would have to remember to thank Inoue for the bread when she would inevitably have to deliver the sad news of Ichigo's demise at the hands of her brother to the gang in Karakura.
“Idiots.”